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Obsessive Lovers: Rant

Obsessive Lovers: Rant

Obsessive Lovers: Rant

Today, I feel like ranting. I’m pissed at people who cannot manage their emotions and proceed to do drastic things in order to get what they want.

Is it a form of mental illness? Is it possession? Can we call it a combination of both? Honestly, I don’t know.

But I find it strange and highly unreasonable to cause people pain just because they won’t reciprocate your love. I mean, make it make sense!

Would you want to have any form of intimacy with someone you don’t love? We all know the obvious answer is no! So why force someone into loving you — knowing full well that if they stay, it’s simply out of fear and not of love. It is ridiculous, pretentious and just outrageous.

When someone says, “If I can’t have you, no one will”, that’s not just a statement; it’s a threat. And no, that isn’t love; it is obsession.

Sad thing is that in some cases, obsessive people are excellent pretenders. They portray a version of themselves they want you to love, then go ballistic when they feel any form of withdrawal.

If you’ve seen the movie ‘Gone Girl‘, you’ll get the perfect picture. It’s the level of manipulation for me. How deranged does one have to be to pull off such stunts? Blackmail. False accusations. Mind games. These are not things anyone should go through. Such things affect people for years — if at all they ever recover.

If you find out your loved one wants to leave, let them! Love isn’t forceful! If they aren’t interested in working things out with you, let them go. Yes, you’ll be hurt. Yes, healing may take some time but at least you won’t be living a lie.

It’s delusional to think that forcing someone to stay will make them love you. How much hate does your heart brew that you think it’s okay to manipulate someone into staying?

Sigh. The world is full of sick, twisted souls. One can’t begin to imagine what people have gone through with obsessive lovers.

I guess we all need to pray for the Spirit of discernment and wisdom at all times. And we need to recognize those red flag and flee immediately we notice them.

It’s a scary place out there. Be watchful, careful and prayerful.

Share your thoughts!

Previous post: Happiness is free

Related post: Be careful who you marry

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Obsessive Lovers: Rant
Obsessive Lovers: Rant

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Viano Dee

Viano Dee is a non-niche blogger, poet, songwriter, and a hardcore romantic who believes that life is something that we all should be positive about. She writes about life generally with the hope that positive change will occur in the life of her readers -- even if it's just in one person. Her write-ups could take any form: poetry, articles, and even songs in ways that'll inspire you, resonate with you, or tell a story while keeping you both informed and entertained.

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Maureen
2 months ago

I hear you. It’s amazing to me at how someone can still be so immature to do things that would hurt another person just because they didn’t get what they wanted. If they truly loved that individual then there shouldn’t be a need for any manipulation or wrongdoing. And I agree, if you meet someone who shows red flags. That’s your sign – run!

Maureen | http://www.littlemisscasual.com

Nishtha
2 months ago

Yes loving means letting go. It may be difficult at times but def important for healthy relationships

pooja
2 months ago

I completely agree with your thoughts. Obsession is difficult to handle. The immaturity and lack of trust could push people to do harmful things. It is important to identify such people and stay calm

Alvern
2 months ago

It’s always important to foster healthy relationships built on trust, respect, communication and honesty. I haven’t seen Gone Girl and I don’t need to see it in order to know when I’m being hurt or taken for an unfair ride.

Lyosha
2 months ago

I do think it looks more like a mental illness not anything else. Obsession is very immature but, alas, very common

MELANIE EDJOURIAN
2 months ago

It can be hard to deal with unwanted attention and worse when it becomes obsessive. You need to distance yourself from the individual and in time they will hopefully move on.

Paula Davison
2 months ago

I know we have all shared your feelings in this rant. The best advice here is, “If someone wants to leave, let them!” There does come a point where the relationship is beyond saving and it’s best to just let it go and find someone who cares for you with the same intensity as you care for them.

Karletta
Karletta
2 months ago

A good rant can be therapeutic. I’m curious to know what inspired your rant. An obsessive lover? Do tell.

Lori Bosworth
2 months ago

I agree that trying to force someone to feel a certain way is not the definition of love! That is definitely an example of controlling and manipulative behaviour!

Lyssa
Lyssa
2 months ago

Yes! I have experienced this several times when I was much younger and its SO scary when someone becomes obsessive about wanting you to feel the same. All it does is permanently drive you away.

Nisha
2 months ago

Being obsessive is manipulative and selfish and better that one stays away from such folks for a healthier and peaceful life. Interesting read.

Smiley
2 months ago

We can’t heal in the same environment we got hurt, that’s why raising awareness is so important.

Di Hickman
2 months ago

100% there are some sick people out there just trying to control others. Sometimes though people are blind to those red flags, or make excuses for them. Personally I saw the first red flag and brushed it off, the second one though… nope goodbye!

Clarice
Clarice
2 months ago

Sorry that you feel this way. All I can say is that if the relationship isn’t healthy anymore — leave. You owe that to yourself. 

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