Dear Single Adults

Dear Single Adults

Dear Single Adults,

I want you to know that it’s not a crime to be single. I understand the pressure that comes with being an adult. There are too many things to figure out and sometimes, we just lose it. Hey, it’s okay. Let’s take it one step at a time, one day at a time.

I also know about the struggles of “single hood” and how families and friends give you the side eye like a reminder that it’s time to settle down. I understand if you’re not ready, I understand your fears. Marriages these days are not encouraging because most times people rush into it and leave at the slightest provocation. Besides, there’s so much you’re still trying to sort out— take your time. Work at your pace.

Settle down when you are ready. Settle down when you’ve found the one. Do not settle down out of desperation or pressure. This has never helped anyone. Don’t envy your married friends because you may not know what they are going through.

There are so many marriages that are crumbled inside and yet on the outside, they patch it up to look like perfection— that shouldn’t be your case.

Read also: Dear Mothers-in-law

Marriage is not a do or die affair, neither is it something you should rush into. There are many married people that would love to be like you. So while you’re here, at this moment of singleness, enjoy every bit of it.

Work on yourself, become a better person. Pray. Double your hustle. Reach for greatness. Do the things you love while you have the chance because after marriage, you become answerable to you spouse.

Dear Single Adults, be patient till you find the one— till your heart confirms that one person. Anyone who pressurizes you into marriage will not be there when things go wrong. But when you make your choice at your own time, you are accountable for the decisions you have made.

As they say, it is better to wait long than marry wrong. Don’t marry because your friends are getting married or because you are pressured to. Marry because your heart tells you it is time to settle down with the one.

Cheers!

mm
Viano Dee

Viano Dee is a non niche blogger, poet, songwriter and a hardcore romantic who believes that life is something that we all should be positive about. She writes about life generally with the hope that positive change will occur even if it's just in one person. Her write-ups could take any form: poetry, articles, and even songs in ways that'll inspire you, resonate with you, or tell a story while keeping you both informed and entertained.

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mm
1 year ago

A wonderful article, yet a bit difficult to abide by in the African continent. If many people waited for the right person not indulge in desperation, the divorce rate would probably be a bit less.

mm
Reply to  Simi
1 year ago

I totally agree with you Simi.

Kristine Nicole Alessandra
1 year ago

My eldest son ended a 6 year relationship with his girlfriend because he found out that the girl was having an affair on the side. He is now anxious that he might end up an old bachelor. I keep telling him to be patient and wait for the right one to come along. He is recovering. His friends have been a big help in boosting his morale.

mm
Reply to  Kristine Nicole Alessandra
1 year ago

Awwwn. That’s just so sad, Kristine. I hope he heals completely and finds the one.

Gervin Khan
1 year ago

Definitely a great and I really enjoyed reading this.

Honestly, this article reminds me during my single adults days. There are a lot of people telling me to settle down and some of them are actually calling me an old maid because I am not yet married.  They didn’t knew that they are the reason why I am so careful and so afraid to settle down because I saw all their bad experiences with their marriage and I don’t want to experience. In short, I’ve waited for a long time and those days of waiting are all worth it because I am happily married to a God fearing man.

mm
Reply to  Gervin Khan
1 year ago

Awwn. Gervin, I’m glad you took your time and married right. Thanks for sharing your experience here.

StressedMum
1 year ago

Great post, in society it is hard to be single for whatever reason, and reading things like this shows that it is ok to be a single person and be happy x

mm
Reply to  StressedMum
1 year ago

That’s very true, StressedMum.

minimalistmiri
1 year ago

Loved reading this!  My husband and I got married young, and while we’re very happy, I see so many of my friends who aren’t married feeling the pressure to be in a long term relationship at minimum, many of them rushing into marriage when they aren’t happy.  I wish there wasn’t such pressure for people to be in a relationship.  I often think my husband and I work so well together because we were content being single (rather than frantically looking for a partner to ‘fit in’), being ourselves before we met, so that when we started dating it wasn’t because of pressure from friends, family, or society and we could be ourselves around one another.

mm
Reply to  minimalistmiri
1 year ago

Awwwn. That’s so lovely. People need to understand that being alone doesn’t mean one is lonely. Thanks for sharing your experience, minimalisticmiri.

Luci Westphal
1 year ago

These are very wonderful and encouraging thoughts that so many people need to hear – not just single people but also those that may put pressure on them!

mm
Reply to  Luci Westphal
1 year ago

Very true, Luci. Everyone needs to hear this.

Subhashish Roy
1 year ago

I got married quite late after all my friends had settled down. But by God’s grace we are doing fine and happy. It’s always advisable to take our sweet own time instead of rushing into marriage. Good thought from you.

mm
Reply to  Subhashish Roy
1 year ago

Exactly, Roy. Thanks so much.

Tochukwu Precious Eze
1 year ago

This is a lovely read.  I remember my days as single, facing lot of pressure from family and relatives to get married and settle down.  Finding some one and to develop a trust relationship takes time.  Its hard to face the peer pressure during social gathering.  Thanks for sharing this encouraging thoughts.

mm
Reply to  Tochukwu Precious Eze
1 year ago

Thanks you so much Heena.

Liz Bayardelle
1 year ago

This is such a lovely read and is applicable to unwillingly-single people of all ages. I definitely wish I could forward it to my past self!

mm
Reply to  Liz Bayardelle
1 year ago

Awwwn. Liz, thank you so much.

Lyosha
1 year ago

it is such an important post. I heard a lot of my friends struggle to stop being single. They want to be married so hard they forgot we marry first place. I wish more people think like you!

mm
Reply to  Lyosha
1 year ago

Thank you so much Lyosha.

TeamRyce
1 year ago

this post should awaken the minds of those people that looked at single adults like it’s their fault. there’s always the right reason and the right time to settle down. you’re correct getting married and settling down is not an easy thing to do. elders here in our country had this saying “ang pag-aasawa ay hindi katulad ng mainit na kanin na kapag isinubo mo at napaso ka ay puwede mong iluwa.” in english, getting married is not like eating a sizzling hot rice and you get burned/hurt that you can just get out of your mouth easily. I’m married for 10years but it’s still like a roller coaster ride. so single ladies or men, don’t be pressured with the people around you, cause at the end, it is still you that will face and handle what you have chosen. sorry for the long comment, just got carried away :), thanks for sharing

mm
Reply to  TeamRyce
1 year ago

Thanks so much TeamRyce. I love the long comment. 🙂

Ashley
1 year ago

This is such a great post and full of wonderful advice. It is completely true that a person should be patient to find a husband. I love this post!

mm
Reply to  Ashley
1 year ago

Thanks so much Ashley.

Liz Santos
1 year ago

Nice read! I would like to share this to my friends singles or not – to have a broader understanding on path which our singles friends are on to. Thank you! – Liz Santos

mm
Reply to  Liz Santos
1 year ago

Awesome Liz. That would be great. 🙂

Fashion and Style Police
1 year ago

Love this post here. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being single. Best to take your time and no rush into a bad relationship. 

mm
Reply to  Fashion and Style Police
1 year ago

Exactly.

Khushboo W
1 year ago

Thats a sweet post. Loved reading it. I will share with my single friends this post.

mm
Reply to  Khushboo W
1 year ago

Thank you so much, Khushboo. Glad you enjoyed it.

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1 year ago

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1 year ago

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